Parenting children after a divorce requires that you and your ex work together. The frequency and extent of this is determined by your child’s needs and the current situation. While some people can remain a parenting team after their marriage ends, others find this very difficult.
Unfortunately, having a successful parenting relationship requires an effort by both adults. When either is uncooperative, the situation can quickly become unbearable. This affects not only your mental state, but it also has an impact on the children.
Kids at the center
You have to keep the children at the center of the parenting relationship. For some people, this is more difficult because they are still mentally stuck in the marriage. They might hold the factors that led to the divorce against the other parent. Until they are able to move past the divorce, they won’t be able to move forward with the rest of life.
Prepare your mind
Your mind is a huge part in being able to get along with your ex so that you can have a good parenting relationship. You need to remind yourself that you are your child’s parent and have the right to make decisions for them.
Another thing to do is to come up with a plan for what you are going to do if your ex starts to fight against everything you try to do. This might be time to take a step back and evaluate the options so you can make an informed and logical choice.
Focus on what you can control
You can’t control everything in life. Instead of stressing yourself out, take the time to focus on what you can control. You can make decisions about what the kids will do when they are with you. This might be making some special tradition that you can enjoy with them. Maybe you will go camping in San Antonio at the begging of each spring or you want to have a movie night at home once a month. This gives you and the children something to look forward to and places the focus on them.
When parenting decisions are set, make sure you include these in the parenting plan. This gives you written information that you can refer to when you need to know what responsibilities you or your ex has to handle or what types of restrictions you might have. Remember that if this needs to be updated, you can seek a modification from the court.